Remember When He Was Mr. Wonderful?

Be happy with the husband you have...

Lying in bed, I turned to my husband James and said, “You really are a wonderful man.”

“I really am,” he said with a smile.

His smug answer made me laugh out loud.  This little interchange has become a running joke with us.  Many times when I say something praiseworthy about James, he’ll listen, smile and say, “I know, I’m really great aren’t I?”

Of course, James means this as a little joke between us and he doesn’t always reply in this smug manner.  But isn’t it a nice thought that if we lavish praise on our husbands, they will live in the confidence of being truly loved and appreciated?

You can make him feel like Mr. Wonderful.

When you were first dating your husband, you thought he was Mr. Wonderful.  That’s certainly how I felt about James.  My heart would start beating wildly when I saw him across campus.  He was utterly perfect in every way to me.  I could listen to him for hours on end, or just sit on the couch together without a care in the world.

We weren’t rushed.  We didn’t hurry to another appointment.  Nothing was a higher priority than being together.  Just to be in the same room was bliss.

You might think, “That was then.  This is now.”  Sure the chemistry and buzz of those dating days wears off, but think of what can replace it.

Deep friendship. 

Long lasting romance. 

Comfort and companionship.

Unfortunately through the years, it’s easy to take your Mr. Wonderful for granted.  Maybe he’s not acting as prince-like as he used to.  Maybe the shine on his armor wore off long ago.

Marriage has a way of putting a magnifying glass over what’s wrong instead of what’s right.

He’s so insensitive.  He has unrealistic expectations.  He isn’t sweet like he used to be. 

Yet if you choose to put the magnifying glass on your husband’s strengths today, you may realize that he’s been Mr. Wonderful all along.

Here are four ways to bring back Mr. Wonderful:

1.  Make a list of five things you really appreciate about your husband.  Maybe he’s patient, a hard worker, or great with the kids.  Share this list with your husband by either reading it to him or writing it down for him to find.

2.  Look a favorite photo of the two of you for ten seconds.  What were you doing when that photo was taken?  How did you feel about him then?  Think about the wonderful memory you made and the joys of that time of life.

3.  Pray for your husband.  Ask the Lord to bless and protect him.  Pray from Joshua 1:8, “Lord, I pray that my husband will meditate on Your Word day and night and that he would be careful to do everything written in it.”

4.  Kiss him for 5-10 seconds.  Not as a prelude to intimacy (although that’s great too) or to sweeten him up so you can ask for something.  Kiss him just to show him that you love and appreciate him.  Look into his eyes and smile.

As you place your focus on the positive traits of your man, you’ll find out that he really is Mr. Wonderful after all.

Be happy with the husband you have…let him know today that he really is wonderful.


Arlene Pellicane


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Written by Arlene Pellicane

Arlene Pellicane is a speaker and author of 31 Days to Becoming a Happy Wife and 31 Days to a Happy Husband. She is currently writing a book with Dr. Gary Chapman (The 5 Love Languages) titled Growing Up Social: Raising Relational Kids in a Screen-Driven World (September 2014). She and her husband James live in Southern California with their three children. Arlene loves to encourage women in their journey to create happy homes that honor Christ. She has been featured on FamilyLife Today, K-LOVE, The 700 Club, Turning Point with Dr. David Jeremiah, and Home Made Simple on TLC. For free resources and more, visit


  1.  avatar

    This is such great advice, Arlene! Thanks for the reminder. And thanks (?) for getting the refrain from Some Kind of Wonderful stuck in my head. Ugh! 😉 But I will use it to remind me where my focus should be.

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    Nicole Cannon says:

    This article made me giggle because my husband (who is also named James) jokes with me like that on an almost daily basis. Great article!

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    Deb says:

    Mine was not ever Mr. Wonderful. I have been his Mrs. Wonderful, not bragging , just the truth. He had me feeling sorry for him and I married him.
    He has not ever been wonderful nor does he intend to be wonderful.

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