Loving My Husband Can Change the World

It was late. The quiet sounds of night fell around me as I sat on my patio in the dark, my fingers poised over my laptop keyboard. Tears streamed down my face as my mind raced and I whispered a fierce prayer.

“God, where are you in this? I feel so helpless! What can I do?”

I was pleading with God to show me how I fit in with all that was happening in the Middle East. I was desperate to help in some way, but feeling inadequate to really make a difference. I wanted to be physically involved somehow, more actively being the hands and feet of Jesus.

But there I sat, thousands of miles away on the patio of my suburban home. My husband and children were sleeping soundly upstairs and my dog laid comfortably at my feet. The air conditioner kicked on and off and the breeze blew my hair as the stars twinkled above me. It was a beautiful summer evening and I was riddled with guilt because of it.

My first inclination in times of distress and persecution is to snap into action. I want to be a part of fixing the situation and in helping those involved. In this case, innocent children were being killed among the hundreds losing their lives because of their Christian faith. I sat feeling both relieved and guilty that I was in the Land of the Free enjoying my {what many would call} safe and lavish lifestyle.

Feeling resigned to “only” being able to offer prayer and fasting, I set about it and asked some friends to join me. But something was missing.

It wasn’t until the next day that God brought to mind a conversation He and I have had before (not audibly, but as something He has pressed on my heart.) I am right where God wants me to be. It’s not an accident that I am located where I am. While I may feel like my best use is in the Middle East right now, the truth is that God has a purpose for me right where I am.

I will never be able to fix the problems in the world all by myself. I may not even be on the front-lines of “big” issues. The reality is, though, that according to Jeremiah 29:11, God has a plan for all of us. Psalm 139:13 and Jeremiah 1:5 say He knit us together in our mother’s womb and that God had us set apart even before He knit us together in our mother’s womb. When we look at those verses, we see that God has a special plan for each of us; a blueprint for our lives to accomplish His purpose. Surely, His blueprint doesn’t include happenstance and unimportant portions of our lives.

So what does all that have to do with my husband?

It was while God and I were having that conversation that it became clear to me that I can’t fix the world. What I can do is minister to those in my sphere. My husband is my first priority and my most important ministry on this Earth. Whether I stay home or work outside of the home, I have an obligation and a responsibility to love and honor him. My actions affect him. As I love and honor my husband, I am showing him the love of Jesus and better equipping him to do the same for others in his sphere. As I follow my ministry to love my husband, I am building him up so that he can honor God in the ministries God has called him to.

Likewise, as I pour into my husband, I am also pouring into my children and displaying for them the love of Christ. They are seeing a living example of God’s love. As they watch, they learn how to love and serve others, continuing the cycle. In doing these things, I am contributing to those on the front-lines, albeit from a distance. Who’s to say that my greatest contribution to God, while seemingly mundane or ordinary, can’t lead to the person who is on the front-lines? Loving my husband, and being prepared to be an example of Christ right where I am right now is how I change the world by loving my husband. I am not helpless when I reach out to God in prayer and ask for wisdom, strength, and perseverance to minister right where I am.

Mandy Pagano

 

Mandy PaganoMandy is a work-from-home wife and mom of 6 children ages 2-9 yrs. She and her husband Joe live in the Pittsburgh, PA area where they homeschool their 3 oldest. In addition, she acts as the coordinator for her local MOPS chapter and teaches preschoolers in Sunday School at her church. Mandy has felt a calling to the ministry of women– and moms in particular– since she started blogging in 2009 at www.SuburbanStereotype.com and later in 2012, with five other women, as the founder of www.DeliberateWomen.org, and she also contributes to www.FruitfulFamiles.com. The sense of community she discovered when joining the “mommy blogging” world was amazing and she envisions creating that same sense of community and acceptance in her writing and during speaking opportunities. Mandy feels that now is the time to step forward boldly in faith and demonstrate a life of love and purpose– and how that looks in everyday life as a wife and mom. It is her goal to be real and transparent–and break the cycle of Christians hiding their struggles so that they will look the part of ‘good Christians’– and allow others to see her imperfect life so that they will gain encouragement and acceptance for their own.

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