20 Small Things to Make a Great Big Difference in Your Marriage

I’ve never even met her. At least not in person.

So you might find it strange that her announcement would fill my eyes with tears. Happy tears. Because that sweet girl is soon to be married and everyone around here is rejoicing with the news.

A wedding! How lovely. How wonderful.

The daughter of my close friend is engaged to be married and we couldn’t be more thrilled.

As soon as I heard their news, I began wondering what kind of gift we could give the young couple. Something special and something lasting. What could I offer that would hold real meaning as they begin their lives together?

But I was sort of stuck and could only think of all the little things. Those tiny moments that go so far into making up a loving marriage. A lifetime of love and joy. Those small treasures that remain long after the wedding day.

So beloved bride – whether you’re newly married or not so much – here is a gift for you. Nothing grand or fancy. Just a few small things that can a make a great big difference in your marriage….

1.    Greet him warmly. When he comes home. When he enters the room. When he’s nearby.

2.   Offer a kind word. He will always be grateful for a kind wife. (Prov. 31:26)

3.    Give thanks. For him and for the life you get to share together.

4.    Speak the truth. In love. Always. (Eph. 4:15)

5.    Look at the bright side. Focus on all that is good and right. (Phil. 4:8)

6.     Shrug off small annoyances. Let those irritating habits bounce off of you.

7.     Snuggle together. Whenever you get the chance. Mostly because it’s rather fun.

8.     Serve cheerfully. It’s Biblical, even if it’s fallen out-of-fashion. (Mark 10:45)

9.     Pray for each other. It really does make a difference.

10.   Listen carefully. About his day, his worries, and his dreams. (Jas. 1:19)

11.    Apologize humbly. Be quick to say you’re sorry and ask forgiveness.

12.    Kiss on the lips. And then linger. Like you mean it.

13.    Laugh at each other’s jokes. Even if you’ve heard them before.

14.    Give a soft answer. Which turns away wrath. (Prov. 15:1)

15.    Step away together. Far from the world and its pressures. Occasionally. Just the two of you.

16.    Smile at him. With all your heart. Light up whenever you see his handsome face.

17.    Forgive fully. Put it completely behind you, never to be brought up again. (Eph. 4:32)

18.    Spend time together. Every chance you get.

19.    Build up. Rather than tear down. You’ll never be sorry for that.

20.   Decide you’re going to love each other. For the rest of your lives. (Mark 10:9)

So blessings on you, my dear. I pray that the Lord fills your marriage with a strong sense of His presence, purpose, and joy. That your love for each other will be deep and abiding. That together you will be a bright light to a dark world who so desperately looks for that kind of true love.

Something special and something lasting.

Lisa Jacobson

P.S. This list is also available as a free printable: 20 Small Things to Make a Big Difference in Your Marriage.

*Check out Matthew and Lisa Jacobson’s new books: 100 Ways to Love Your Husband and 100 Ways to Love Your Wife