5 Ways I Became Best Friends With My Husband

Guest contributor Lisa Jacobson, Club31Women

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He often introduces me as his girlfriend.

Ever-so-slightly embarrassing.

He’ll say it to the barista at Starbucks, or the cashier in the check-out line of the grocery store. Even to the new couple we met at the homeschool picnic.

After 22 years, you’d think I’d get used to it, but it still makes me blush.

And smile.

I always hasten to add that I also happen to be his wife –an important fact to establish when you have 8 children together.

And I’ll flash my wedding ring to prove it if necessary.

I think he gets some kind of odd gratification out of my embarrassment.

Then pretends to protest, “What . . . you are my girlfriend, aren’t you?”

Yes, well . . .

It’s true: I am a girl. And I am his friend.  A close friend.

The best of friends, really.

So I guess that does make me his girl-friend.

And like most good friendships, ours has grown over time. We’ve had to invest in our friendship and look after it.

So many times people think it’s because we somehow just “click.” But while there might be some “clicking” between us, it’s more than that. Far more than that.

It wasn’t as though we instantly became best friends. It’s been a long, purposeful process.

Here is how we became the best of friends….

By spending time together.  I know. You’re going to tell me how busy you are. I understand busy. And yet I figure I manage to get a shower (usually) and several meals a day. That’s because it’s a priority with me. I need these things.

I also need time with my husband, so I can make that happen too.

By being nice to him.  You know how you’re super sweet to your girlfriends?  Smile and cheer them on? Do nice things for them? Yeah, well, it’s kinda the same here. This friendship is no different.

Play nice.

By being interested in his stuff. So I have one friend who is really into gardening. And another who is into goats. I am not particularly keen on either of those things – but since it’s my friends we’re talking about here, I’ve decided to be interested. For their sakes.

Same with my husband.

By having fun together.  Friendships are never all business, are they? Of course not! It’s not like you sit down with your girlfriend and constantly go over the budget, or decide who is going to drive which child where.  No, you sip coffee, go fun places and laugh at each other’s stories!

Hello . . . ?

By praying for him. If you’re a friend of mine, than you already know that I pray for you.  I can’t always get away from the kids, or write long emails, but you can count on my praying for you. It’s one of my “love gifts” to my friends.

And I pray for my husband and he knows it.

Just this past week-end Matthew was out-of-town on a business trip and called to ask me to pray for him about a particular issue.  I started praying as soon as I hung up the phone.

Because that’s what friends do.

So if you ever run into my husband and he introduces me as his girlfriend, just smile and go along with it, will you?

Maybe even tell him that you feel like you already know him . . . . since Lisa talks so much about her boyfriend. ?

Embracing friendship.

*This is an excerpt from the newly-released Marriage Wisdom Devotional for Her—Available HERE

In His grace,

Lisa Jacobson,



Are you taking part in this week’s challenge?

Carve out some time to spend together. Do something that takes your minds off of screen time. Then make it a habit.


Don’t forget to read your Bible this week…

R – 1 Samuel chapters 16-20

E – Expand on questions you might have as you’re reading (dig deep and take notes).

A – Ask yourself how you can apply this scripture to your marriage.

D – Decide if there are any changes you need to make or actions you need to take.

For our reading assignment this week, I chose to focus on the relationship between David and Jonathan. Although this wasn’t a romantic relationship, their friendship teaches us a lot about humility, self-sacrifice, and love.

While Jonathan may have been next in line to be king, he stepped aside to allow God’s will to be done. He didn’t despise God’s choice or hold a grudge against David. He courageously and humbly supported his friend.


Just a reminder, our Bible verse this week is…

Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others. – Philippians 2:3-4


I’m Lisa Jacobson, wife to Matthew, and mom to 8 children. I believe you can enjoy a stronger faith, a closer relationship with your husband and children, and a peaceful home. Find out why – and how at club31women.com

Check out Lisa’s books:
100 Ways to Love Your Husband
Marriage Wisdom Devotional for Her



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  • Christina Kirk

    My husband will often refer to me as his “bride”. We aren’t newly weds, 47 years, 5 children, 14 grandchildren. But I am his “bride” along with other nicknames we usually use in private. Love being his “bride”!
    WE are the Bride of Christ.
    My husbands mantra is “perpetual courtship”, for couples.
    Blessings to you and your boyfriend!

  • Weslie

    My husband always introduces me as his”first wife”. It always makes folks stop and wonder what he means by that. I often wonder if they are thinking that he has a second wife running around somewhere… I married him for his sense of humor. Got what I wanted!

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