In John chapter 17 we read how Jesus prayed in the Garden of Gethsemane just hours before his death. What’s always struck me as interesting is the fact that unity was heavy upon His heart. In that one chapter alone, He appealed to the Father five times on our behalf asking for unity among believers.
If you’ve ever wondered why unity is so important to Jesus, we find the answer in verse 21. Let’s read the verses surrounding it too:
20 Neither pray I for these alone, but for them also which shall believe on me through their word; 21 That they all may be one; as thou, Father, art in me, and I in thee, that they also may be one in us: that the world may believe that thou hast sent me. 22 And the glory which thou gavest me I have given them; that they may be one, even as we are one: 23 I in them, and thou in me, that they may be made perfect in one; and that the world may know that thou hast sent me, and hast loved them, as thou hast loved me. – John 17:20-23
When believers are unified we bear witness to God. Most importantly we bare witness to the fact that Jesus Christ was sent from the Father to redeem us from sin.
Whether we go to church, read our Bibles, kneel in prayer, put money in the collection box or say, “God bless you,” on a Sunday morning, the most evident fruit in a believer’s life will always be His love for God and his love for others.
If we don’t have that, people will question our faith, and worse, they may question the God that we serve.
Let me step back for a minute. In fact let me step back about 25 years so I can share a little story with you. I promise I’ll bring you back to present day shortly.
When my husband and I were newlyweds, we met a young couple who were eager to get married. She was an odd girl who wore boots to bed. Definitely not popular. No friends to be found.
I felt a tug on my heart. Someone had to step up and show her some love. So I decided to put together a Jack and Jill shower.
Do you know what that is? At a Jack and Jill shower, you invite both men and women to wish the bride and groom well and shower them with some gifts.
In total there were six guests: my husband, my friend, my grandma, my sister, my sister’s best friend, and myself. Michael baked a double layer chocolate cake while I made little sandwiches and a big bowl of punch.
Huddled in the living room we waited until the sound of the doorbell announced their arrival.
“Surprise!” We stood from our seats applauding the soon-to-be-couple.
“Surprise what?!” she yelled. “There’s not going to be a wedding!”
Stomping into the room, she flopped down on the couch, crossed her arms over her chest and sat there in silence.
Standing nearby was a young man who was horrified, devastated and crushed.
Shortly thereafter, she went outside with her fiancé where they worked out their problems before coming back in.
What does that say to the world? Other than the fact that we’re human, and growing in grace, it can signify a lack of humility and a lack of respect.
I know she was young, but even mature couples can struggle to control their emotions. I’ve had my days too.
God calls us to be a unified church. Let’s start with a unified marriage.
We’re called to bear witness of Him, not merely with words, but with actions that bring us to the cross time and again. Actions that bring us down to our knees in prayer petitioning on behalf of those that we love. When people see love, they see Christ.
We live in a fallen world with broken people. Therefore there will be sorrow, there will be broken hearts, and there will be days when we have to speak to someone about it.
Do it.
But do so in a way that brings glory to God and your marriage. Speak to someone who can breath life into your marriage. Speak to someone who will pray with you. Speak to someone who will guide you with wise counsel. Speak to someone who is seeking the best for your marriage according to the will of God.
And most importantly speak to the One who offers hope and redemption even on the darkest of days.
You are loved by an almighty God,
Darlene Schacht
The Time-Warp Wife
I just downloaded the book and can’t wait to get started!
Thanks for joining us!
I love how raw you are and still it embraces the reader to draw closer to the Lord and their loved ones! God has definitely blessed you with a great opportunity with this blog to impact many! cannot wait to get my book and start the October challenge! Looking forward to reading your book!! I have listened to you on Women Living Well videos and followed your blog also! Thank you for being such a blessing and being obedient to God!
Thank you so much! I’m glad you’re taking the challenge Jacqi. Your encouragement blesses me.
I just purchased your book on Friday and am loving it!!! After some tough times over the summer I love the honesty in your book and can see myself in may of the same situations you have written about. It makes me feel uplifted to know that even though I may stumble I can put my faith in the Lord, move forward with a stronger faith and marriage. Thank you!
Yes, amen! God doesn’t care what you did yesterday. He wants to know what you’ll do today. 😀
Another helpful post for the marriage retreat. Thanks!
I honestly have never though of this before, like relating how Jesus wanted unity for us and ten relating that to marriage, but it makes sense! Thank you, I love your books and your wisdom. God bless you!
Emily, thank you for your encouragement.
Looks like a cool gift to win.
Love your blog. Your are such a blessing!!
Great article! Loving all the topics for the marriage retreat!
Darlene,
My soul sighs a heavy “Yesssss” to this post. It’s something I’ve believed for so long, but never heard articulated. Our best testimony is a unified marriage. Although both my husband and I were raised by Christian parents, we understood that their “church relationship” was very different from and superior to their “home relationship”.
Although far from perfect, we are striving for marital authenticity. I wish their were more role models to be found, but we will keep working and praying to fill that space for our children.
Thank you!
Thanks for sharing that Shannon. And yes–our children need more of this in their lives!
I have just recently subscribed to your blog and love it. I can not wait to read the book. So inspiring to me. I am a fairly newly married gal(almost 4 years), with a 2 1/2 year old son and another bundle of joy on the way. I love finding ways to strengthen my faith and my marriage. Thanks so much for all you do, but most of all thank you for being a Godly example.
Thank you. And congratulations!
Looking forward to getting started on another great read! Thank you so much for writing books that allow me to better understand my role as “wife” and “mother”.
You’re so welcome!
I am going to go get the book now! Thank you so much for this! 🙂
Aww, thank you!
Great post. I especially liked the ending about talking with someone in a way that brings glory to God. It’s great to have people in your life who can remind you of the truth when you need to hear it. Thanks for sharing.
Yes. Those people are so important.
Thank you I need this
Thank you for this giveaway chance.
Looking forward to the prayer challenge and reading your new book
Your book will truly bless many marriages! Thank you.
Thanks for the reminder how important unity is to the family of believers and within our own marriages!
Great reminder about the need to *pursue* unity and not just expect it to happen.
Thanks for the chance to win a great gift! I can’t wait to read your book!
I just found your site. I am excited to read it and help myself and my husband.
I’m glad you found us. Welcome Jennifer!
I enjoyed reading this story. It made me really look into my marriage and see how I both do and do not respect my husband at times. I need to pray about this and see what God reveals to me about how I can improve in this area. Thank you for all you write!
You’re welcome. Thank you!
What a challenge! I know I need to learn to control my emotions better and be more unified with my husband. Thank you for the reminder and resources to help!
New fan of your blog!! The book sounds great!
Awesome! Glad you’re here Nicole!
Going through a difficult time in my marriage right now. This article has given me much to pray about. Thank you for this opportunity.
I’m sorry to hear that Margie. I pray that your marriage is strengthened.
Love this! Thank you for the insight!
Awesome contest! Thanks for the opportunity to win.
I’ve purchased your book and can’t wait to get it!
Woohoo!
I just found out about the embracing marriage conference! And, I’m bummed that I missed the prior weeks 🙂 I’m joining in this Monday! p.s. Thanks for the fun giveaway!
@Dawn, we have a 31 day prayer challenge in October too!
Unity in Christ does start in the home of every believer. In your prayer time and while in the Word…then together with your spouse. The reason the wprld today sees no difference in the believer and the non believer is because they cant see our Unity…in Christ, our homes and our relationships outside the home. We are too busy arguing abt what we personal feel abt a subject OUTLOUD for the whole world to see…and they see no difference. Unity in one core belief seems in vital…unity in how we deal with each other, lifes battles, etc makes any realtionship stronger…but we must first be UNIFIED with CHRIST for anytbing else to work. Same goes for the good ole US of A…we are just that for now…United. But the more this country has turned away from Gods will…the very foundation of our country, the more ununified we are. Its a sad state…united we stand…divided we fall….that is for ANY relationship. THANKS FOR your posts!!!
Thanks for adding that Heather!
Just saw this post because of peak313! And I subscribe to you on Facebook, that tricky Facebook, need to make sure I always see these!
Oh Facebook had been a brat this year. LOL
“Speak to someone who can breath life into your marriage….” Those words “breath life” really struck a cord in my heart. In a world where divorce is so prevalent and not particularly discouraged, do I seek to encourage others in their marriages and offer positivity and Godly encouragement? Do I speak highly of marriage to my single friends & co-workers or do I tend to bring up negativity?
Good questions for all of us to ask ourselves. I like that.
So well said and such an important lesson to learn for sure! Love each other..so simple yet so hard. Thank you for your words. 🙂 Lots to think about.
Yes, so hard some days. Easy to remember when all is going our way.
I went through all the marriage trauma with the help of God and my husband (who was the source of the trauma). I had no one to talk to and no one to breathe life into my marriage except God. What an amazing testimony to His faithfulness! He DID breathe life into our marriage and restored that unity we had lost. In addition he piled blessings upon blessings even amidst the trials. Now we find that He will be using US to be the life breathers! How amazing is that? I loved this post. It made me smile to know that God affirms our hearts even when we aren’t completely sure what the next step should be. He knows the next step cause HE created the path. Love you and your heart!
Linda, I love the term “life breathers.” Awesome way to look at it!
I can’t believe in just now finding you. I love the way you write and I’m anxious to share some of your insights with my mentoring group & my sister’s in Christ. Thank you!
oh, I’m so glad you found your way Irma!
Thankful to already have an awesome marriage, but like some of your ideas to use in counseling others.
Awesome!
So blessed to have a wonderful marriage. But always ways to make it better.
Amen!
You have a wonderful blog. Thank you for the chance to participate in your giveaway.
Thank you, Joy!
Thank you for sharing your wisdom.