One night a while back, I noticed a little water on the kitchen floor by the sink, which is par for the course considering that most days Nathaniel spills far more than he drinks. I grabbed a tea towel and wiped up the spot. No problem. But when I went into the kitchen an hour later, I noticed a bulging box of dishwasher detergent under the sink and a puddle beneath my feet. I knew we had a leak somewhere that had to be fixed. It wasn’t too serious, but enough of a drip that I stood on towels to wash dishes and had to change my socks.

The sound of Michael tinkering in the kitchen after dinner was music to my ears. Since we both know that water can cause permanent damage if it’s left to soak, he wanted to repair it right away.

The Scriptures remind us of yet another damaging drip—a contentious woman: A continual dripping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike” (Prov. 27:15 NKJV).

Contention appears in numerous ways, including opposing, nagging, arguing, challenging, belittling, and competing. And why do we do it? Because somehow we think that by nagging we’re encouraging our husbands to be better people. The truth is that husbands—and wives for that matter—should be handled with care and respect.

In the same way that a leaky faucet can cause permanent damage, our words if left unchecked, can damage our relationships and cause resentment to grow.

I can’t imagine what the state of my kitchen would be in if we let that faucet leak for ten years, but that’s what it’s like in some marriages. Sometimes the faucet’s been dripping for years, and they wonder why they’re not friends anymore.

Here’s the thing… Friends encourage you. Friends cheer you on. Friends are there to support you. Friends listen to you. Friends have your back. Friends are truthful yet compassionate. Friends make you laugh.

In other words, “A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly” (Proverbs 18:24).

This is an excerpt from my book: Messy Beautiful Love: Hope and Redemption for Real-Life Marriages.

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Tilling the Soil

Read Proverbs 27.

Planting Hope

A continual dripping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike. (Prov. 27:15 NKJV)


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Darlene Schacht and her husband Michael live in Manitoba Canada where the summers are beautiful and the winters are cold. Together they’ve come to learn that relationships aren’t always easy, but that marriage, the way God intended it to be, is a treasure worth fighting for.

She began her publishing journey about twelve years ago when she pioneered one of the first online magazines for Christian women, known at the time as “Christian Women Online Magazine.” After three years, Darlene left CWO to blog as a solo author at Time-Warp Wife Ministries.

It was also during this transition that she worked alongside actress Candace Cameron Bure to write the NYT Best-Selling book, Reshaping it All: Motivation for Spiritual and Physical FitnessReshaping it All was the winner of both the 2011 USA Best Book Awards and the 2012 Christian Reading Retailers Choice Awards.

Author of more than 15 books, Darlene continues to write and to minister to her readers through her blog at TimeWarpWife.com.

Connect with Darlene:

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You are loved by an almighty God,

Darlene Schacht
The Time-Warp Wife