Day 8 – Who is on the Throne in Your Marriage?

by | Nov 25, 2011 | 31 Days of Love, Marriage, Marriage Challenge


Can you remember the time when you were a new bride and you couldn’t wait to serve and please your husband? Maybe greeting him at the door with a passionate kiss? Making him his favorite meal? Wearing your hair a certain way? Having a sweet spirit?

But then life interrupts our fairy tale romance. The wedding is over. The newness and excitement wears off and our marriage begins. We start to live in the mundane. Children enter into the world. Bills can’t be paid. Reality strikes our marriage, yet, we want to keep the love and passion alive. But how?

When I was a new bride my husband told me to serve the Lord and in my doing so, he would be served. I didn’t really understand what he meant by that, seeing how I had only been saved for about a year and half. As he expounded on his thoughts, he shared with me about putting the Lord first in my life, living for Him and pleasing Him. As a result of me putting Jesus on the throne of my life, my love for Christ would naturally spill over into my marriage in a way that I could not physically do on my own.

The result: my husband would be served. (In laymen’s terms: I could not be the Proverbs 31 woman through my own human strength but only through the power of Christ.)

So I have tried to be extremely intentional about putting the Lord on the throne in all aspects of my life ESPECIALLY my marriage. In fact, outside of my relationship with Christ, the second most important relationship I have here on earth is the one with my husband… my first ministry.

So my question to you is this. “Who is on the throne in your marriage?”

Is it any of the following?

  • Yourself – your dreams, wants, desires
  • Your husband, his job, schooling, hobbies
  • Your children
  • Your family or friends
  • Your outside ministries
  • Your trials
  • Your past

It is so easy for any of these things to become first in our lives, yet, God desires to be first in all areas of our lives, including our marriage.

Our husbands will disappoint us; after all they are sinners just like us! But don’t look to your husband to be your Savior, reserve that position for Christ alone.

We can always choose to serve ourselves, but in order for a great, Godly marriage to take place, you need to choose to serve the Lord. “Chose for yourselves this day whom you will serve?” Joshua 24:15

For your marriage to blossom, (rather than wilt or die), you need to take your eyes off of yourself and put them on the Lord. Let Christ sit in His rightful place in your marriage–His throne.
I’ve only scratched the surface here, but there is more to come at: The Alabaster Jar.
Jolene

Today’s Challenge:

Be willing to ask your husband for his forgiveness for actions where you tend to put ‘self’ before ‘sacrifice.’

Here are some ideas:

  • Your contentiousness and lack of respect
  • Your unwillingness to follow him (submission)
  • Your discontentment
  • Your frustration with his leadership
  • Your cold shoulder towards him
  • Your lack of intimate affection with him
Just for the record, my husband and I are often apologizing to one another, because we do stupid, selfish, and rude stuff to each other all the time!

“Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me remove the speck from your eye’; and look, a plank is in your own eye? Matthew 7:4
Today’s Challenger:


Jolene Engle was once a feminist who denied the existence of God, until the Lord transformed her life. For the 15 years that she has walked with her King, 10 of those years she battled chronic and debilitating illnesses at the onset of motherhood. For the past 4 years of her life, Jolene and her husband have faced financial ruin. They lost their home not just once, but twice and they and their 2 sons are now residing with friends. Even though her tiara is broken and her gown is tattered, she still lives as a daughter of the King, where she strives to teach others how to pour out their lives at the feet of Jesus like the perfume from an Alabaster Jar.


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