We all have them–disagreements, fights, tiffs, arguments, quarrels, squabbles, disputes… Call them what you will, but we all seem to have them.
Michael and I didn’t really argue until our kids came along. Exhaustion and stress can do that to you. Sometimes a little sleep is the best solution for both of us, other times we need to sit down and calmly communicate our issues until we work out a solution.
The problem is that when you’re angry and hurt, it’s easier to argue than it is to be calm. It’s easier to stew in your anger than it is to let go.
Pride is destructive. It tells you how it’s more important to be right than it is to do right. It makes you feel little, while it tempts you to grasp a false sense of importance. It’s deceptive. It interfere’s with God’s word by twisting the truth into a lie. It beckons you to hold on to anger and hate. It rejects the mere thought of humility.
Here’s the thing about pride. It lurks in the shadows waiting and hoping that you’ll invite it back in. And when you do, it takes the wheel.
We all have a choice when we’re angry. It’s not always an easy choice, but we do have the ability to choose between pride and humility.
If you’re reading this and you don’t know how to let go of your anger; if you’re wondering how to get past a nasty fight, but you’re feeling hurt and confused; here are a five steps you can take to soften your heart and take back the wheel:
1. Reject the urge to get even. God sees and hears everything. He will punish, and He will reward.
2. Stop right where you are and pray. It’s almost impossible to stay angry at someone when you’re praying for them. Make this your first priority.
3. Stop keeping score. It really doesn’t matter who apologized last time, or who apologizes most of the time. Just because someone else isn’t courageous doesn’t mean you have to be weak.
4. Accept the fact that no one is perfect. You might feel like you’re better than someone else, but the fact is that we’re all sinners saved by grace.
5. Don’t mirror the bad behavior of others. Don’t be nasty because someone else is a jerk–that only brings you down to their level. Look to Christ for Your example, and follow His lead.
6. Before you try to be understood, make an effort to understand. Be humble enough to look at things from another perspective.
7. Exercise patience, humility, and grace. Like any other exercise, it isn’t easy. It requires effort, but it always improves your spiritual health.
You are loved by an almighty God,
The Time-Warp Wife
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