31 Days of Prayer for Marriage

Keeping Your Marriage Holy and Pure (Marriage Challenge – 31 Days of Prayer)

Day 21 - 31 Days of Prayer for Our Marriages

One of my all-time favorite Christian choruses has to be “Refiner’s Fire” by Brian Doerksen. I absolutely love the lyrics and I must say that this part always makes me tear up:

My heart’s one desire
Is to be holy
Set apart for You, Lord
I choose to be holy
Set apart for You, my Master

Before that song came out in 1990, I hadn’t really thought about what the word “holy” meant. To be honest with you, I kinda thought it meant being religious. I’m embarrassed to admit that now, but that was about the sum of my knowledge. I was a church goer and a Bible reader; I had Christian friends, and I taught Sunday school. That was my definition of “holy.”

I later came to realize that being holy meant that we are dedicated to the Lord and set apart from all things impure:

But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do;  for it is written: ‘Be holy, because I am holy.’  1 Peter 1:15 & 16



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  • BB

    Where you spend your time is where your thoughts will be…praying constantly for your husband and pouring into him ( no matter the state of your marriage) will be a game changer! It’s worth the challenge when it’s hard to do!!! You will be blessed, he will be blessed!

    Thank you Darlene for encouraging us in The Lord! Thank you for reminding us to give our best to our husband! You are an amazing woman that I am so thankful to have in my life!!!!

  • Peggy

    How beautiful Darlene! I too love the song of the “Refiner’s Fire” but the process of refining is another story. A wonderful writer, blogger friend of mine, once wrote about some of what takes place in the process of refining for a sculptor: “http://sharonsharinggod.blogspot.mx/2014/07/carved-deeper.html” so this prompted me to look further into the process of refining and there are many different things that are refined like gold, silver, sugar, wine, oil, petroleum, copper, (metals in general) and also a word study on “refining” with the Bible at http://biblehub.com/topical/r/refining.htm
    and than thinking about my own personal refining and making comparisons.

    Also focusing in on the process of diamonds… since we are “diamonds in the rough” … “more precious than silver, more costly than gold, more brilliant than diamonds”(another song). “Someone pointed out that if we are willing to walk through the fire of testing, we will be refined through that fire, and made into purest gold, which is just as transparent as glass with Him. We become so clear and pure that anything we do or say will be seen as glass. No impurities will be found; no flaws or imperfection will be able to stay, because they will immediately be noticed within. The process of purification is repetitive, often time-consuming, and very intense.” A diamond’s process includes: mining(being found), crushing (we all have felt that), separating (being set apart), greasing or new method of x-ray (inspected), cutting (being finalized). Interesting process— quite similar to ours and our marriages to be pure and holy. Prevail Magazine had a wonderful article on this: http://www.prevailmagazine.org/gods-diamond-in-the-rough/ I saved a copy of it even because I so loved what it says especially about a diamond’s worth and beauty (judged by its 1) cut 2) clarity 3) carat 4) color

    Yes, this is my prayer. Not just in my marriage but in my Christian walk. To be pure and holy! Indeed we must be willing to have the old chiseled away and endure the Master’s Refining! There is another song, an old hymn that puts this beautifully in “How Firm a Foundation”. We may not like the process but the end result will make it all worthwhile.

    May our marriages be refined to be just as you wrote and our lives as Christians: set apart, pure and holy!
    Thanks Darlene! This is inspirational and beautiful. A wonderful encouragement.


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