Marriage Challenge: 5 Ways to Revive Your Attitude

Growing up in the 70s, we were given one shot for a good photo. Put on your best smile, and hope the picture turns out. There was no second chance, no redo, and no allowance for multiple shots (those prints were costly!).

Things have changed, haven’t they? I love that about modern technology! I’ve always got a camera on me and it doesn’t cost any more to take extra shots. If one doesn’t look right, you just take another. And if it still doesn’t look right you take one more. Upload your favorite pic to Instagram, and you’re ready to go. I’m not well versed on filters and apps, but like thousands of others, it’s important for me to put my best out there. That includes a warm smile. 🙂

So what does photography have to do with our topic today? Here’s an interesting little fact: look up the word “attitude” in the dictionary and you’ll find that the origin of the word comes from “attitudine,” a technical term in art for the posture of a figure in a statue or painting. (dictionary.com)


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Posing is all about choosing the right position whether it be in dance, photography, art, etc. Attitude is about choosing a position of the mind.

There are two sides to any situation we face–a positive side and a negative side. The pose we strike determines which side we take. As difficult as it might be at times, we have the choice to choose our attitude.

I’ve had days when I know that I’m grumpy, and even though I have the ability to change my attitude, I don’t. I hang on to the negativity. I enjoy the pity party more than I should. Praise God for His grace as He gently leads this work in progress.

We talked about my tagline in the last post, “Empowering Wives to Joyfully Serve.” I use the word “joyfully” because I firmly believe that our attitudes have the power to set the tempo in our homes.

Have you ever heard the saying, “When mama’s happy, everyone’s happy?” I know it to be true in our home because a good attitude is not only contagious it offers a sense of assurance to others. It sends out an empowering message of contentment which is important to have.

“But godliness with contentment is great gain.” – 1 Timothy 6:6, NIV

Do you want to develop a good attitude in your marriage, and set the tone in your home? Let’s look at 5 ways to do that:

  1. Train yourself to focus on the good and tune out the bad. Your husband will especially appreciate this as you notice the little things that he does.
  2. Make sure that you’re getting enough sleep. A well-rested wife is a happier wife.
  3. Start the day off by spending some time with the Lord. Reading scripture and praying about your day will get you off to a great start. He will direct your paths, and work in your heart.
  4. Consider the fact that your husband is human. Offer him grace and room to grow.
  5. Avoid inspecting the grass at all costs. If you start looking over the fence at other marriages you’ll soon be comparing your own husband to theirs. Remember that your marriage is unique. And because your husband is also unique, any comparison you might have is pointless.

You are loved by an almighty God,

Darlene Schacht
The Time-Warp Wife

P.S. Come back here on Monday for week 2 in our “Revive Your Marriage” series. 

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We’ll have a new challenge each Monday this month. Don’t forget to focus on this week’s challenge over the weekend:

Begin to notice the decisions you’re making internally this week, and make a special effort to choose well. Don’t let pride, anger, or disappointment have a say in this decision, but rather choose humility, kindness, and joy.


Don’t forget our Bible reading assignment for this week. I’ll have a different one for you next week.

R – Read Genesis 37-46

E – Expand on questions you might have as you’re reading (dig deep and take notes).

A – Ask yourself how you can apply this scripture to your marriage.

D – Decide if there are any changes you need to make or actions you need to take.

Joseph is a prime example of someone who was willing to shape his attitude according to God’s will. Despite all of the pain he endured, he remained fair and giving and kind. He could have easily let his circumstances dictate his actions, but he chose to forgive, he chose to be kind, and he chose to trust God.


Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will. ~ Romans 12:2, NIV



Messy Beautiful Love: Hope and Redemption for Real-Life Marriages
by Darlene Schacht | Available at Amazon.com  (affil link)

Love gets messy.

Financial problems, sickness, aging parents, a chronically unhappy spouse . . . trials will inevitably come that threaten your marriage. No matter how long you’ve been married or how strong your relationship is, sooner or later you are going to have a mess to clean up.

MessyBeautiful Love is about cleaning up messes God’s way, exchanging your ideas for His, and being prepared for both the best and the worst that marriage has to offer.


Darlene Schacht and her husband Michael live in Manitoba Canada where the summers are beautiful and the winters are cold. Together they’ve come to learn that relationships aren’t always easy, but that marriage, the way God intended it to be, is a treasure worth fighting for.

She began her publishing journey about twelve years ago when she pioneered one of the first online magazines for Christian women, known at the time as “Christian Women Online Magazine.” After three years, Darlene left CWO to blog as a solo author at Time-Warp Wife Ministries.

It was also during this transition that she worked alongside actress Candace Cameron Bure to write the NYT Best-Selling book, Reshaping it All: Motivation for Spiritual and Physical Fitness. Reshaping it All was the winner of both the 2011 USA Best Book Awards and the 2012 Christian Reading Retailers Choice Awards.

Author of more than 15 books, Darlene continues to write and to minister to her readers through her blog at TimeWarpWife.com.

Connect with Darlene:

Facebook: @timewarpwife
Instagram: @timewarpwife
Pinterest: @timewarpwife
Twitter: @timewarpwife


One Comment

  • Lisa Goeke

    This topic is soooo true! I found this out by Gods gentle nudging. One year my husband said he would spend the day with me on my birthday, and we could do whatever I wanted! Well he figured I would want to do the same thing I always do, but I wanted something new. Soon found out he had alterior motives! We drove a car that had lost the interior door panel and was loud. My husband had on a sports talk radio station, (which I don’t care for) a little too loud because of the door. And top of all that I woke up with allergies so I could not hear out of one ear. And he was trying to talk to me over all this noise! When i explained to him that i could not hear, he turned down the radio. And than told me he was going to use the day to get new work shoes, But as I sat there grumbling in my mind. God spoke to me. He told me that my husband has a lot of things to finish and accomplish, plus works 12 hour days and drives 50 minutes each way. So here he was setting aside those things to spend a little extra time with me. And I started to wonder, how much of my grumpy, bad attitude is affecting our marriage and our life? As I changed my attitude from grumpy to pleasant, I could literally see the change in my husband. And my day became better. Even though he spent too much money on his shoes and there was not much money to spend on me. Even though HE became grumpy because of that, And I started to think why is he mad at me? We still managed to have a nice dinner and stop at some stores and buy a few little things. But my demeanor was pleasant and it became a nice day. its easy to think “he always does this or not that” our feelings. It’s harder to see their view point. I”m just thankful for God and his patience with me. That by opening up my eyes and showing me how just a little thing can bring about the thing that I really want. To be close and spend time with my husband. Not as I had hoped or wanted, but learning and growing together. Looking forward to the rest of the month and what God has put on your heart to share with us, t Darlene

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