31 Days of Prayer for Marriage,  Uncategorized

How Your Spouse Can Become Your Best Friend (Marriage Challenge – 31 Days of Prayer)

Day 23 - 31 Days of Prayer for Our Marriages

He often introduces me as his girlfriend.

Ever-so-slightly embarrassing.

He’ll say it to the barista at Starbucks, or the cashier in the check-out line of the grocery store. Even to the new couple we met at the homeschool picnic.

After 22 years, you’d think I’d get used to it, but it still makes me blush.

And smile.

I always hasten to add that I also happen to be his wife –an important fact to establish when you have 8 children together.

And I’ll flash my wedding ring to prove it if necessary.

I think he gets some kind of odd gratification out of my embarrassment.

Then pretends to protest, “What . . . you are my girlfriend, aren’t you?”

Yes, well . . .

It’s true: I am a girl. And I am his friend.  A close friend.

The best of friends, really.

So I guess that does make me his girl-friend.

And like most good friendships, ours has grown over time. We’ve had to invest in our friendship and look after it.

So many times people think it’s because we somehow just “click”. But while there might be some “clicking” between us, it’s more than that. Far more than that.

It wasn’t as though we instantly became best friends. It’s been a long, purposeful process.

Here is how we became the best of friends….


How Your Husband Can Become Your Best Friend

By spending time together.  I know. You’re going to tell me how busy you are. I understand busy. And yet I figure I manage to get a shower (usually) and several meals a day. That’s because it’s a priority with me. I need these things.

I also need time with my husband, so I can make that happen too.

By being nice to him.  You know how you’re super sweet to your girlfriends?  Smile and cheer them on? Do nice things for them? Yeah, well, it’s kinda the same here. This friendship is no different.

Play nice.

By being interested in his stuff. So I have one friend who is really into gardening. And another who is into goats. I am not particularly keen on either of those things – but since it’s my friends we’re talking about here, I’ve decided to be interested. For their sakes.

Same with my husband.

By having fun together.  Friendships are never all business, are they? Of course not! It’s not like you sit down with your girlfriend and constantly go over the budget, or decide who is going to drive which child where.  No, you sip coffee, go fun places and laugh at each other’s stories!

Hello . . . ?

By praying for him. If you’re a friend of mine, than you already know that I pray for you.  I can’t always get away from the kids, or write long emails, but you can count on my praying for you. It’s one of my “love gifts” to my friends.

And I pray for my husband and he knows it.

Just this past week-end Matthew was out-of-town on a business trip and called to ask me to pray for him about a particular issue.  I started praying as soon as I hung up the phone.

Because that’s what friends do.

So if you ever run into my husband and he introduces me as his girlfriend, just smile and go along with it, will you?

Maybe even tell him that you feel like you already know him . . . . since Lisa talks so much about her boyfriend. 😉

Embracing friendship.

Lisa Jacobson,  Club31Women

Lisa Bio Pic
Lisa is the happily-ever-after wife of Matthew L. Jacobson, literary agent and writer, and together they enjoy raising 8 children. Please join her over at Club31Women, a blog for any wife, mother, or sister who is looking for Biblical encouragement and inspiration.

Check out their books –  100 Ways To Love Your Wife by Matthew L. Jacobson and 100 Ways to Love Your Husband by Lisa Jacobson.

Visit Lisa at her website, and find her on facebook.


  • Lindsey @ SimplyLindsey

    The tip you gave about being interested in his stuff is SO incredibly true! I’ve experienced that in my marriage for sure. There was a time when I didn’t really care much about football (one of my husband’s #1 interests). The second I showed an interest and actually watched a game with him (not just sitting on the couch and reading while the game was on!), he lit up and it deepened our relationship! Now I am loving football too and it’s a fun and unexpected hobby that we share together! 🙂

  • Charice

    My husband and I are the best of friends. When we’re at odds over some issue, it is the friendship that I mourn and the closeness that friendship has brought over the past 17 years. I can’t imagine my life without him and my prayer is that I show him that more and don’t take him for granted.

  • Jim and Barbs Fortin

    My Beloved was always talking when he played Hockey when he ; was up in Canada. Skating to school over a frozen lake. I challenged him to prove it. That was the atart of 10 years on a over 40’s Team. Even when he fractured his wrist at a game, He couldn’t give it up, so he coached his own tean for those months to a win.. Now we have a team 16-20 yrs, at our own rink, where he is a Penalty Box attendent-I Say he just directs traffic in the penalty box! , but he corrects me.. Me, who never knew what hockey was, find myself putting all these games on the callendar and having the tuks, gloves, blanket and coffee! Like yesterday, there was an unexpected game, ‘give me 5 minutes and I’ll be ready’ I was too! When our Blazers Team, took the two first places for the a new team that is surprizing! When the two banners and trophies were presented, I was was proud of our boys! .
    His team is also doing well.
    Yes, he is My Beloved and am His Bride! still after 31 years comming this month on the 29TH.
    My Beloved asked me years ago to pray about a certain matter. ^ yhears later,m I and my Service Dog Zamboni, give him a prayer send off. I am convinced he works in a jungle!

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