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Scratched, Worn, and Imperfect, But Still Lovely
Special Note: This article is part of an intentional home series by Davonne Parks. To view the rest of the articles in this series, go here. It feels like yesterday. It feels like a lifetime ago. A distant memory… but not so distant. I was 19 years old. He was 20. My friend Kelly did my make-up, and I wore a long, white dress while I walked down a long white aisle. We thought we were so grown up. We thought marriage would be fairly easy because we were in love. Then we went on our honeymoon… We thoroughly enjoyed being together, but by the final day, we were ready…
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Brave Your Marriage
“You make me brave You make me brave No fear can hinder now The love that made the way” As the sanctuary filled with a congregation of voices singing these words from Bethel’s song “You Make Me Brave,” I felt his fingers reach for mine. It was his brave act of the day. You see, we’d had a rough month, my husband Ted and I. In fact, you could say we felt a bit like Alexander. You know, the little boy who had the terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. Except ours dragged on and on and on for weeks. While we hadn’t woken up one morning with gum…
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When Your Spiritual Gifts Clash With Your Spouse’s
It was a simple phone call that landed me in hot water. A phone call and an innocent mistake led to a tense few moments between my husband and myself. I ordered take out for a friend who was in need and made a mistake when ordering. The result was an extra $20 charge that I didn’t expect. I tried every which way to fix my mistake, but the restaurant wasn’t budging. I just had to suck it up, hope my friend really liked General Tso Chicken, and explain to my husband what had happened. Unfortunately, the conversation went exactly as I expected: Joe was annoyed and I felt guilty.…
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Living Well, Forgetfully
My husband Ted’s flaws? Well, I’ve been asked about them more than once … including on live radio. I suppose that’s what comes from devoting an entire chapter in my book Team Us to the “killing” of old habits in marriage. And do you know what happens? Every. Single. Time. My mind goes blank. After which, I end up muttering something about Ted’s time management issues. A flaw for which with every additional interview I do, I think he’s slowly earning the reputation as poster boy. You see, in that Bill-Murray-Groundhog-Day-type-moment of mine, it’s all I can come up with. Juicy, I know. It’s not that Ted doesn’t have any…
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How to Have a Lighthearted Marriage
I’ve heard tell that desperate times call for desperate measures. My husband Ted and I hit one such first-world measure en route to our honeymoon destination, Paris. On the car ride from our condo to the airport, it struck us that we’d forgotten one very important item: a camera. I mean, seriously, who — prior to the days of iPhones and Instagram — packs for anywhere in Europe and forgets a good, old-fashioned camera? No big deal, we decided. We’d make a quick stop and buy one. So there we were, at a Kmart less than a mile away from the airport at five-thirty in the morning, frantically determining our…
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5 Ways to Tell Him “I’m Crazy For You” Without Ever Saying a Word
We wives can be such chatterboxes. And so often we try to use our words to show our husbands love and respect. Or to tell them just how crazy we still are about them. Sadly, we also at times use our words to wound; a weapon to throw when we feel hurt or ignored or agitated. {Trust me, I know this!} So let’s turn the tide. No words of anger or frustration. No, “You never!” and “Why can’t you?” In fact, no words at all. Here are five ways to show your man you love and respect him; that you are head-over-flip-flops in love with him {I’m not a big…
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The Secret to Finishing Your Marriage Well
“How would you like to spend the rest of your life eating breakfast across the table from me?” the man asked boldly. The petite, dark-haired woman his words were directed at giggled. Perhaps her cheeks even blushed at such forwardness. “Big flirt!” she thought, secretly reveling in his attention. The year was 1952. The place, a Midwest college cafeteria. The man, Lysle Schmidt, was my maternal grandfather. Well, he would be one day. The woman was Esther Imler. You guessed it, my future grandmother. Yep, it turns out that my husband Ted isn’t the only guy I know who’s unafraid to utter the “M” word on a kinda-first date. Grandpa…
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Asking for Help
I don’t know exactly when it started, I just remember feeling angry and frustrated with my husband – almost every single day – for weeks. One evening after a pretty intense “discussion,” J.J. told me that no matter what he did or how hard he tried, it was never enough. He was right. I constantly found fault in him as a husband and as a dad. But the fact that he implied I was impossible to please … well that sent my already-unreasonable emotions reeling. I grabbed my coat and stormed out the front door. Hot tears streaming down my cheeks, I replayed our conversation in my head. Determined to…
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5 Ways to Bless Your Husband at Mothers Day
Mothers Day is for moms, right? Yes….. But it is also a perfect time to bless your husband and better your marriage as you do. Here are 5 easy ways: 1. Take a walk down memory lane. Go out for coffee or another favorite beverage. (While I’d go for a coconut-mocha latte, my man would choose raspberry lemondade) Take along some pics from when you first became parents. Reminisce together about your children’s’ births. About when they were tiny. But also talk about what life was like BEFORE you heard the pitter-patter of little feet at your place. What do you miss most about life B.C.? {before children} But, what…
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Everybody’s Workin’ for the Weeknight: 4 Reasons to Love Weeknight Dates
“Do you think they’ll still have tickets?” my husband Ted asked over our dinner of Pollo Tropical chicken and guava BBQ riblets. As you can tell, we’re big spenders on date night. “I think so,” I thoughtfully responded. “After all, it is a Wednesday night. How busy can it be?” Of course, in the back of my mind, I wondered the same thing. We were headed to see the film Divergent. At that point, it’d only been in theaters for six days and the show started in less than 30 minutes. Plus, we planned to see it in IMAX. Not necessarily because we wanted to, but because the time best…
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The Secret Behind 60 Years of a Loving Marriage
She was only seventeen. Young, strong and determined. He was 19 and enlisted in the Navy. But they were both in love and so they married. They soon started their family and were blessed with four children: two daughters and two sons. As he was quite the adventurer – bush pilot, missionary, and pioneer – their lives were never dull. And she was always right there by his side. She looked after him. She stood by him. And she loved him through it all. Eventually I met and married their youngest son and so I got to call them Dad and Mom too. Now those two have been married for…
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The Security of Our Story
Hearing our love story gives our children the assurance that they were meant to be. “Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be”. Psalm 139:16, NIV Carrying plates to the table, mashed potatoes and gravy piled high, I watch as my teenage boys plop down in their chairs. Peeling black paint reveals my secret – the original white enamel. I smile, remembering this was the first piece of furniture their dad and I bought together. We’ve sat around this table sharing stories and meals with these two boys for almost two decades. Tonight we’ll sit and talk and linger…
Daily Devotions & Bible Studies for Women
